I got on my first kill mail in over a year.

I shouldn’t have.  There was only half an hour to downtime.  I had a headache, which was bad enough to put paid to my DDO Guild plans.  I had only logged into check a contract.  I hadn’t used Voice Comms for a while so it would need patching, or configured my new headphones for it.  They had already left, and I would have to chase them.

So many excuses, but I joined the fleet in an Interceptor anyway.

I am not a natural when it comes to PVP.  I don’t have a killer instinct, and don’t really gain personal satisfaction from killing another player.  Without practise, I get the PVP shakes.  It annoys me, but even just getting settled into the rhythm of a fleet can inflict me with excess adrenaline.  I would like to say I am eager for the hunt, but my instincts are probably saying run.  PVP also requires Voice Comms – and I hate the sound of my own voice.  Actually, my wife and friends might strenuously disagree with that last statement, so I should clarify.  I hate hearing the echo of my own voice – it annoys me, and is nothing like what I hear inside my head.  All told, PVP takes me well out of my comfort zone.

The idea of it however does intrigue me.  I wouldn’t mind understanding it better, and getting comfortable with it.  (As I found I can if I am involved in it regularly enough.)  I like the theory of it, I like flying under an FC who knows what they are doing, and I appreciate watching someone with real skill in it.  Collecting a killmail even appeals to my hoarding nature.  So overall, it has a somewhat abstract allure for me.

Given the short period we roamed, there was a surprising abundance of targets.  We had a hauler jump into us as we arrived on a gate – I managed to be composed enough to get a point, orbit, and fire off a couple rounds before it departed – stabbed.  We ignored a Harbinger sitting well off a gate.  We got the next Hauler as the interdictor was in place this time.  I managed to get a point on that one too – although aside a rack of warp stabs, it was untanked and dropped almost instantly.  I then got a point on the pod, mis-clicked on the orbit, and ended up flying well out of range.  I did manage to do 254 points damage as I approach and then flew out of range – leaving 1 point left and the killing blow to one of the other fleet members.  It was interesting to note the POD kill mail, and the death of a CA-1 Implant.

Scouting on the way back I jumped into a system to find a Tornado 60km off the gate.  If I could get in close he couldn’t scratch me, but I had a bit of distance to make, and even if I took it out at a wide angle there was the risk of being insta-popped, or just having him warp off.  Expecting I wouldn’t get a tackle, I warped 300km off the gate, the Tornado warping as soon as the interceptor de-cloaked.

Rusty with newbie mistakes with orbits and mis-clicks, but at least I maintained some semblance of tactical awareness, and by the time I docked the PVP shakes were forgotten.

Now as long as I keep joining fleets, I might just start on that path towards familiarisation, and dare I say it, a level of comfort.

One thought on “Killmail

  1. Funny… PvP is sooo PUSHED on ya, and expected, in EVE. I have never said it outloud, but I feel sorta like you do most of the time, only ever now and then I do have my sanguinarius moments…

    I like it so very much… when I’m in the mood… but as Gurney said, “Mood is a thing for cattle, and loveplay!!!” “Guard yourself for TRUE!” =]

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